August 2010
14 posts
So i’ve come to the conclusion that, for the most part, i know who i am. Problem now is figuring out what i want.
Let’s call it “love”, for lack of a better word.
Looking through old records i realize that who i am indeed is who i’ve been.
ROTD: I not only have a deleteable relationship, i have a fairly deleteable identity/personality
Even as a geek, it scares me just how much we as a society rely on technology.
It’d be nice if i could be in a relationship that can’t be deleted off an sms inbox. I feel like i’m going crazy again.
Good to be able to hang out with someone i’m comfortable talking to. :)
ROTD2: Not all thoughts, conversations, and moments are meant to be captured. I need to stop trying.
ROTD: The anxiety i feel probably isn’t any different from what everyone feels. It’s just amplified.
It’s funny, though. Tell any of my navy buddies i’m socially anxious, they probably wouldn’t believe you.
Run toward my fears? But isn’t that what i’ve -been- doing?
Realization of the day (yesterday): it takes a split second to feel emotion but forever to describe it in words.
Seeing the older female filipino sailors makes me wonder how I’ll age…
Just realized this weekend is my last weekend here. Gotta get packing.
July 2010
55 posts
So i just read through my senior exhibition presentation. Holy hell, people had to sit through that?
It’s funny. I’m not the only one enjoying the summer thunderstorm.
Random realization of the day: I don’t want to -make- things work. I want something that just does.
Looking for the right one, you line up the world to find, where no questions cross your mind…
Slowly realizing… TPU is hold. Just out in the Fleet.
We’re close and then we run.
So yeah. Apparently my ship is haunted.
Theme of Guys and Dolls: 2) You can’t control who you fall in love with
Theme of Guys and Dolls: 1) Don’t fall in love with someone you shouldn’t
Watching Guys and Dolls. Scene at Havana with Sky and Sarah. Hm…
What am i getting myself into? :)
Going italy. Making new friends. Roommate is a gamer. I like life a lot right now.
Navy is accelerating my life yet again.
That was one messed up dream.
Eating greasy fries with my HM2 roommate. Navy is accelerating my life in weird ways again.
Facing the fact that i may indeed not be home for christmas.
Holy shit. How did i forget one of the main themes of this movie?
Watching Chasing Amy. Good stuff. Glad i bought it.
Also realizing. The way to my heart = someone reading everything i write
Realizing the most challenging thing i have to do for now is to feed myself.
Listening to Obey The Moderator. I feel like i’m getting my individuality back. Didn’t realize it was lost.
Sometimes i feel like i’m going insane and i just don’t want to take anyone down with me.
Realizing how empty a military base seems on the weekend.
All common sense is telling me “No”… again and again.
So yeah. Definitely not capable of sleeping through the night anymore.
“You just gotta live, stop planning your moves, just let em happen, you might be...”
– Little Black Book
Vegetable and tofu pho doesn’t taste good when you’re depressed. :|
Found the galley and the mini-mart. Came back and HM2 is my new roommate. That’s enough adventure for one day.
Why is everyone here soaked in sweat?
Absense makes the heart grow fonder. But it also lets the imagination wander.
I have this overwhelming “I don’t know what to do with myself” feeling.
Shipmates help shipmates out. :)
First class. Nice.
I miss my twidget. :\
Just saw a mouse run through my area of DFW. Fun stuff.
Just saw a bunch of DEPpers at the airport. I remember that day…